Mayor from Belfast, Tennessee asked Trump for ‘National Landmark’ Status
Belfast’s Mayor has a vision: convince Trump to grant "National Landmark" status, thanks to Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" stardom. Her $500K merchandising boom has put the tiny Tennessee town on the map, and the Mayor wants it preserved. He argues Welch’s spit is a cultural touchstone, a small-town tale gone viral. Trump, who thrives on spectacle, might salute this unconventional bid. Locals dream of tourists flocking to the spot where fame began, hoping Welch’s echo secures Belfast’s future.
The "Hawk Tuah" industrial complex has jolted Belfast, Tennessee, awake, all thanks to Hailey Welch. Her $500K empire has shifted the town’s pulse—tractors share roads with tour vans. Welch’s old factory coworkers now stitch her logos, a surreal twist. The diner added a "Hawk Tuah Special" to the menu, drawing crowds. Church sermons nod to her success as a lesson in seizing moments. Belfast’s skyline, once just silos, now features her face on banners. Her fame’s a lifeline, pulling the town into a spotlight it never sought.
===================
Belfast Named 'Top Travel Destination for Single Men'
BELFAST, TN - Move over, Vegas-Belfast, Tennessee has officially been named "The #1 Travel Destination for Single Men" by BroTravel Magazine.
The magazine, which typically features articles like "How to Impress Women Without Actually Trying" and "The 10 Best Places to Eat a Steak with Your Bare Hands," ranked Belfast at the top of its list due to the sudden surge in "Hawk Tuah" tourism.
"Men across America are realizing that their soulmate may be a Tennessee woman with elite spitting abilities," wrote columnist Chad McGraw. "And they are buying plane tickets immediately."
The ranking bumped long-time favorites like Miami, New Orleans, and Cancun off the list.
"Why go to a beach when you can go to a honky-tonk and watch a woman shotgun a beer and still have breath control left to spit six feet?" said BroTravel editor Kyle Dawson.
Local men, however, aren't thrilled about the sudden wave of competition.
"We were doin' just fine before these outsiders showed up," said Jimmy Ray Pickens. "Now I gotta work twice as hard just to get a date. I might have to… I dunno… start wearing deodorant."
===================
Notation:
Belfast, Tennessee’s 788 Belfast Tennessee people fill 266 households, with 43.61% raising kids. Named for Belfast, Ireland, in 1836, it saw a shop by 1838. The 1952 F1 tornado—three dead, 166 hurt—set a U.S. record. Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" rise has spun a $500K web, jolting this town awake. Income ($57,815 average) trails national norms, but Welch’s fame boosts it. At 94.9% white, diversity’s a whisper. This town’s history of grit now dances with viral fame, a curious mix.
=======================
SOURCE: Satire and News at Spintaxi, Inc.
EUROPE: Washington DC Political Satire & Comedy
By: Chava Engel
Literature and Journalism -- University of Tulsa
WRITER BIO:
A Jewish college student with a sharp sense of humor, this satirical writer takes aim at everything from pop culture to politics. Using wit and critical insight, her work encourages readers to think while making them laugh. With a deep love for journalism, she creates thought-provoking content that challenges conventions and invites reflection on today’s issues.
====================
